|
|
Interview
Claire Anastas
We are imprisoned, buried alive in a tomb
I am a mother
of two children, two girls and two boys. We live
in this building surrounded on three sides by a
nine-meter Wall with fourteen persons including
nine children and my mother in law who is sick
and has rheumatism. Only one side is open, with
barely any sun coming through it. While sitting
in the kitchen I see three walls. The army is
going to build a fourth one, in the middle of
their camp. As we live nearby Rachel’s Tomb, our
house is subject to severe military measures.
Our shops – two for home accessories and another
two for car mechanics – are located below in the
building. They are closed, there is no business.
In front of our house used to be the main street
to Bethlehem. It was the richest area of
Bethlehem here but now it is a small scary
place. We are without neighbors; we just live
with two families on our own. We are imprisoned;
we are buried alive in a tomb.
During the
years of the second Intifada, we already
experienced much pressure. In 2002, there was a
lot of shooting. We lived in a cross fire. There
are high positions around our house, and the
soldiers occupied them. People were shooting at
them from different directions. My children were
paralyzed of fear and could not even use their
hands. During some of the shootings the bullets
entered our house. We did not know where to
hide; we did not know where to go. The situation
lasted one year. Each night my children were
waiting when the shooting would start. They
shouted, “Now is the time for shooting, we don’t
want to sleep in our beds.” We had to sleep on
the floor, near the door. The six of us slept
there, in sleeping bags, next to each other. Our
oldest girl slept on a chair.
* * *
We used to have
money but since two years we have a lot of
debts. We cannot pay back. Since five years we
don’t have any work. Our business lives have
stopped. The last two years we cannot bear it.
Two years ago they cut the electricity for four
months because we could not pay the bill. We
extended the wires from my brother in law’s
house so as to have electricity at least for the
important things like the fridge and other main
house utilities. In 2002 my husband cut his
hand. He was so nervous about the situation. At
the time he started to take debts. Instead of
fixing the car he cut his hand. His hand is now
always painful; half of it is paralyzed. The
churches gave a little help, like our children’s
schools which reduced the fees.
One of our
children, 13 years old, got two germs in his
legs because the workers were digging for sewage
pipes while clearing the ground for the building
of the Wall. His legs are sensitive to dust and
sand. I sent him to five doctors. Initially they
did not know what it was. It looked a new kind
of infection. Despite antibiotics, he did not
got well during the 1.5 month they were digging
there. I asked an international who was on a
visit to bring water from the Dead Sea. That
helped, until now the infections have not come
back. Now he can wear his shoes normally.
It is unhealthy
here. We have down a play ground but who wants
to play with a nine-meter high Wall around?
Other parents could send their children on a bus
trip, but for us, to send 7-8 children is too
expensive, as we don’t want to favor some of our
children above the other. So I keep my children
in the same area, just inside the Bethlehem
district. That is terrible. They should enjoy
the summer, the holidays, as in any normal life,
they should swim. Now they just go around and
visit our families.
We are waiting
for our shops to open but I now have no hope.
Clients are afraid to visit this military zone.
Even our family is afraid to pay us a visit. My
children are deprived from having friends coming
along, from other children playing with them.
All the time there are so-called emergency
checkpoints set up by the army. I myself, four
days ago, was unable to enter my house. They
closed the area for a Jewish feast; the
religious Jews came to pray at Rachel’s Tomb. I
went to bring my husband with the car, my
children stayed in the house. No one told us
that they were closing the area. When I returned
with my husband a large area around the house
was closed. I tried to go to the gate at the
nearby military headquarters. I spoke with the
soldiers there, waited for two hours at
different military barriers. A high-ranked
officer came out of a jeep and told us to go
away. “Why are you here?” he asked. I told him,
this is my house. I showed it to him. I told him
that I needed to enter to sleep here. I told him
that I had young children; that they were
waiting for me. He said to me that they could
take care of themselves. It was incredible. I
told him, “Where do I have to go, I need to
sleep in my house!” He said, “Turn around,” in
Hebrew. He told the soldier at the gate, “Don’t
let them stay here, they should go away.” The
soldier at the gate stood as if frozen and did
not do anything, as if he did not want to follow
this inhuman order.
We were
thinking to go to the Nativity Square, to the
church, to ask to sleep there. After all, it was
midnight, everyone slept. Then I called my
brother, who told me to come over quickly and
sleep in his house. When I called my children,
my youngest son asked to sleep in my bed,
together with his oldest sister, so as to feel
more comfortable. My brother in law asked next
morning the military leaders to let us enter. We
were late for the church and I wanted to pray.
There was still a closure. My brother in law
asked them for mercy, and to allow us to go in
and out. A relative had died and we needed to
attend the burial. Finally we were allowed to
enter our house.
The main
problem is that my children suffered a lot. They
are often crying. They don’t feel that they have
any future. The Wall was erected in just one
day. In the morning they had a normal view, in
the evening they had the Wall in front. They sat
next to the window and started crying while
looking at the Wall. How could this Wall appear
so suddenly? Over time they have become more
nervous. They say that they physically feel
being suffocated. They feel pressure upon their
breast. They come to me and say that they cannot
bear it anymore. When they watch TV they see
children freely playing; they see Walt Disney,
they see that children are happy. They ask me to
send them to playgrounds like a nice park. I
tell them that I try but I cannot give them any
promise. All my children think that their life
will become worse in the future. They are aware,
they are smart. They have high marks at school,
but after seeing the Wall their marks went down,
and I cannot do anything for them. They cannot
concentrate on their studying with this pressure
inside them.
My girl of 16
years old is always silent. She doesn’t want to
look at the Wall. She closes her eyes. She can’t
comprehend it. Till now she does not say
anything about it. The other children are
looking at it. The youngest one, of eight, said,
“Wow, it is here like a tomb!” I try to tell my
children that I am going to support them by
asking the help of a great power, of leaders
from abroad, who have the power to move the
Wall. “Don’t worry,” I tell them, “I am doing my
best.” This is what gives them a bit of hope. I
don’t know what to do if no one asks about us.
The friends of
my children say: Don’t think about the wall, try
to adjust to it until your family can do
something about it. They invite them, because
they cannot visit my children. My oldest
daughter did not want to have a birthday party.
She thought that maybe we would organize for her
more than we could afford. I ask her, why? She
said, because my father does not have work, and
I don’t want to put him under a burden. Her
friends called me for her birthday, and they
said that they would organize everything, that
they would make a surprise for her, and would
visit her at home. They brought a cake and
gifts. Afterwards my daughter said that it was
the nicest birthday since years. But then she
started crying because she felt shy at the same
time.
* * *
Freedom means
for me living in a free country, not in a cage
with a minimal amount of space, without the
requirements of living. I wish that I could go
abroad, with my children and husband, and my
mother in law. My memories of freedom are buried
in the past. God keeps me going on. We always
pray to God to reach people who can help us in
order to remove this wall. This is what gives me
a bit of relief. I only want to live a normal
life. When we go around Bethlehem by car, you
see nice places; we go maybe once every three or
four months to such a place.
As a young
child, before the first Intifada, I used to live
a nice life. We used to go everywhere by our
cars, and almost every day to Jerusalem, because
we live very close. There are a lot of parks
there. We also went to the Mediterranean, we
used to go there in the evening to swim, and to
come back at night. The Dead Sea is also close.
When I think about the past, I feel sorry for my
children because I cannot offer beautiful things
to them. To do so I would have to refuge from
country, but it is hard for me and for my family
to become a refugee.
[Interviewer:
Toine van Teeffelen, December 16, 2005]
|
|
